Lighthouse Tuesday: Radical Self-Acceptance

Time to be the lighthouse for yourself. Yep, I am talking self-acceptance — of the radical variety.

I love SARK’s book Make Your Creative Dreams Real and I am particularly fond of her words on radical self-acceptance:

“If we don’t accept ourselves, we won’t accept all or part of our creative dreams. We can practice self-acceptance and still wish to change or improve parts of ourselves. The basis of radical self-acceptance asks us to accept how or who we already are before we make any changes.”

Whoa. I have to re-write one of her sentences for emphasis because I am feeling rather wind-gusted by it: “We can practice self-acceptance and still wish to change or improve parts of ourselves.” Get that? I’m still letting it sink in. I think many of us place ourselves in an either/or binary with change: we have to think we suck in order to make change. What SARK says is just the opposite: love yourself first, suckitude and all, and then the changes will happen.

SARK also writes, “Often awareness is all that’s needed for a shift to take place.” So awareness (and love and understanding and acceptance) are needed for our own expansion and transformation.

Sometimes when I work with my clients, I find that their speaking a truth (on whatever level — physical, emotional, mental, or spiritual) releases a tension in the body or a blocked chakra by just the acknowledgement of the feeling or truth. There was no great insight or solution, but just an affirmation of what is. And boom: a transformation right beneath my hands!

Try this:

Find some aspect of yourself that you feel lives in the suckitude category (that’s our judgment, right? — it doesn’t mean it’s true, rather we feel it’s true) and first acknowledge it. Sometimes that first stage is really hard. Be gentle on yourself. Then see if you can work toward acceptance of it — sweet talk it, ask it questions, learn about it, see if you can understand it — and then allow it to be. That is your action toward change. You need do nothing else at this point. Find your way to acceptance and the action steps toward transformation will expand right in front of you.

About Courtney Putnam

I first came to healing work through art and writing. Creating collage art and poetry in particular allowed me to deeply understand the benefit of self-expression in the healing process. But, I also began to see the benefit of bodywork (manual work in the form of massage and energywork in the form of Reiki) as keys to unlocking the emotional stresses we hold in our bodies. I became a Reiki practitioner in 2002, received an MFA in Creative Writing in 2003, received my massage license in the spring of 2006, and became a Reiki Master in 2010. In my practice I bring together these three areas -- the body, the mind, and the spirit (or energy body) -- so others may experience profound and positive change in their lives.
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2 Responses to Lighthouse Tuesday: Radical Self-Acceptance

  1. Michelle says:

    Oh another book to add to my ever growing list of books that I want to read. Your posts recently have been so timely, thank you for sharing these words. I think I need to go meditate on the word awareness for a while now. That seems to be a recurring theme lately.

  2. Thank you for your words, Michelle. I will meditate on the word “awareness” with you. Blessings, Courtney

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